Am I the only person who sees a well known person and immediately wants to work with them? I don't know why, I just want to be the right-hand man for that person. I want to be the one they bounce ideas off of. I would love to be the person that is privy to their private thoughts. At first I wanted to know what was on their mind. Then I reminded myself that I can be annoying and I don't want to hear what people think about my antics.
Anywho, this may be my desire to get out on the open road at any means necessary. It could also be that I just want to gravitate to interesting people. Or people that I find interesting. I haven't figured that part out just yet. I usually find that it's a person that doesn't stay in one place for too long. Usually performers. I never realized that before. Since I can't think of a single non-performer to refute that I'll try to come to terms with it. I've had the desire to be behind the spotlight in several people's lives. Whether it be touring as a tech or sitting in planning meetings, I want to be a part of it. I say behind the spotlight because being on stage or in an interview isn't what comes to mind. In my minds eye I see hours of building stages. I see dinner meetings about the day ahead. I would be the face that blends into the wall as I make sure they go the right direction at an event. People looking at who I'm with don't know I exist, but I'm there. I'm always there.
I'm finding that this urge isn't something that will just go away if I wait long enough. It's been at least eight years since the first desire to be close to someone I admire and have them look to me as either a friend or business partner can be recalled. Knowing someone in the spotlight has nothing on seeing them away from the public eye. I can't figure out what's up with my fascination with behind the scenes. All I know is that it even begs my attention in my dreams. Regular dreams and daydreams.
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