Now a word from Lili

That's pronounced leelee. It is short for Literal Linda. She is going to be voice of the thoughts that I take literally when people say it's a joke. Lili understands that the ideas that people place out in the world under the guise of flippant are not always. We (ahem, that is to say I) will be exploring the world through these literal eyes. This will make some people angry.


Lili writes:

So the whole six weeks of playing the same seven songs...I don't care how you mix is, it is the same song...has begun. Now there are only three weeks left. Like I'm sad about it ending.

Of all these songs that are continuously grating on my nerves "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" happens to be my most hated.


I absolutely Hate. That. Song. It is the worst. What is it with these kids that they are so against their moms? Then the only way for the mothers to confess themselves innocent to ruin the aspect of Santa delivered gifts. So either it's I-hate-my-mom-because-she-cheated-on-my-dad or it's all-this-time-dad-pretended-to-be-Santa. Either way sucks. It is the beginning of youth passing through to leave jaded young individuals.

Okay, one for her too.

With her it's an automatic role of sophisticate that does the announcement.

Ladies and Gentlemen, (yes I have to start with this cliche, it just works for me)
(an hush falls over the crowd)
We've watched her rob banks and run with the vampires.
Go on blind dates with for her mother and take trips in space with her brothers.
And now she is here. Direct your eyes to the stage and witness the amazing.
She brought to life our favorite plain Jane, though she is not plain at all.
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you
(^for some reason it feels right to say this a second time)

Kristen Stewart


More work history in this one. Now I'm wondering what event would warrant an introduction of this kind. I don't watch enough events to know. Looks like I need to start cuing in on my competitions. Ha!

For some reason I wanted to write this intro for him

I don't know why.


Ladies and Gentlemen,
What you've all been waiting for.
He's what all the girls dreams are made of.
The next in line member of the wolf pack.
Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for the hottie with the body,

Mister Taylor Lautner


Now the emphasis on the words of this announcement changes from wanting to be ring master to attendee of an awards show. It started as me wanting to introduce him as if I was at the circus. But for some reason that equates male voice to me. Then when I changed it to awards ceremony, it lost it's excitement. Instead it went to sultry, elegant woman. The one with the arched eyebrows and PERFECT makeup. With the former rush some phrases and allow myself to be a tad crude. I get to be loud. With the latter I have to approach the words softly and insert phrases like "for lack of better words." I don't know which one is more fun. I feel an interview coming after both, but still. Ring master garb, or spend the night as an elegant lady? Decisions, decisions.

I do enjoy where my mind takes me.