Interesting

I think there's a fine line between being a slut and being classy. I walk in between that line. - Katy Perry

I like being a woman, even in a man's world. After all, men can't wear dresses, but we can wear the pants. - Whitney Houston

I don't play that disrespectful hoe shit. And if I catch you with my man, disrespecting, I will beat your ass...and his ass. - Kimora Lee Simmons

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships.
- Sharon Stone

Nothing against men...I just liked it.

Gone...I know, not the right boy band.

Every once in a while I am hit with the big realization. Paul Kevin Jonas, Jr. is married. I mean married. Taken. Off the market. A fish that isn't one of the plenty in the sea. He's married.

As an adult I am trying not to be one of the many woman who mourned the day he said "I do" to the girl he's lucky to have (that's right, I said it. Ask him, I'm sure he'd say the same), but being that he is my age he was the only one I could fantasize about dating. The calm yet fun one. Not afraid to laugh and in possession of the dreamy deep voice.

I know a tidal wave of grief swept the nation. Many men, women and children are trying to come to grips with this prized member of the Jonas Brothers having no more need for his purity ring. I am hoping that his wife (that's right, get used to it) doesn't have to deal with the crazies...ladies, he won't leave her because you threaten to kill her. If you endanger her your chances with him will go to nil. Keep your idle threats, letters, and glares to yourself. Go find the nice boy that's been looking at you for the past year or so and date him.

I am a huge fan of the Kevin Jonas...of the Jonas Brothers in general. So here's praying that this marriage continues to be a testament to love. I wish nothing but happiness to Danielle and Kevin Jonas.

Now a word from Lili

That's pronounced leelee. It is short for Literal Linda. She is going to be voice of the thoughts that I take literally when people say it's a joke. Lili understands that the ideas that people place out in the world under the guise of flippant are not always. We (ahem, that is to say I) will be exploring the world through these literal eyes. This will make some people angry.


Lili writes:

So the whole six weeks of playing the same seven songs...I don't care how you mix is, it is the same song...has begun. Now there are only three weeks left. Like I'm sad about it ending.

Of all these songs that are continuously grating on my nerves "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" happens to be my most hated.


I absolutely Hate. That. Song. It is the worst. What is it with these kids that they are so against their moms? Then the only way for the mothers to confess themselves innocent to ruin the aspect of Santa delivered gifts. So either it's I-hate-my-mom-because-she-cheated-on-my-dad or it's all-this-time-dad-pretended-to-be-Santa. Either way sucks. It is the beginning of youth passing through to leave jaded young individuals.

Okay, one for her too.

With her it's an automatic role of sophisticate that does the announcement.

Ladies and Gentlemen, (yes I have to start with this cliche, it just works for me)
(an hush falls over the crowd)
We've watched her rob banks and run with the vampires.
Go on blind dates with for her mother and take trips in space with her brothers.
And now she is here. Direct your eyes to the stage and witness the amazing.
She brought to life our favorite plain Jane, though she is not plain at all.
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you
(^for some reason it feels right to say this a second time)

Kristen Stewart


More work history in this one. Now I'm wondering what event would warrant an introduction of this kind. I don't watch enough events to know. Looks like I need to start cuing in on my competitions. Ha!

For some reason I wanted to write this intro for him

I don't know why.


Ladies and Gentlemen,
What you've all been waiting for.
He's what all the girls dreams are made of.
The next in line member of the wolf pack.
Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for the hottie with the body,

Mister Taylor Lautner


Now the emphasis on the words of this announcement changes from wanting to be ring master to attendee of an awards show. It started as me wanting to introduce him as if I was at the circus. But for some reason that equates male voice to me. Then when I changed it to awards ceremony, it lost it's excitement. Instead it went to sultry, elegant woman. The one with the arched eyebrows and PERFECT makeup. With the former rush some phrases and allow myself to be a tad crude. I get to be loud. With the latter I have to approach the words softly and insert phrases like "for lack of better words." I don't know which one is more fun. I feel an interview coming after both, but still. Ring master garb, or spend the night as an elegant lady? Decisions, decisions.

I do enjoy where my mind takes me.

Hide the kids...the whites are coming!

When I look at my friends and force myself to focus on race, I find that most of them are white. To this I say "So what?" What is the big deal with a girl hanging out with more of the opposite race than her own? Why is there a quota on the amount of black people a black person should hang out with? And why do the select black people have to be a certain type of black to count? These questions were apart of my everyday life. I am a black, dark skinned, oreo, African American, whatever you want to call it...I'm not white. However, most of my friends (best friends) are. I have searched my soul to figure out why. Since everyone else has an opinion about it, it's time I answer the question for myself.


I enjoy the company of my friends. I like being able to laugh at the silliest of things. I love how they keep me grounded. While I am with them I don't have to be anything other than myself. Isn't that what friendship is about? Apparently not...I mean sure you want those qualities in your friends...just in those of the same race and ethnicity. Right?


Let's compare. When I hang out with the "certain" type of black person (the one that counts) I have to act as if I am in to rap music. I'm not. I have to get down with belittling myself and them with ridiculous put downs and terrible language. Don't get me wrong...I can cuss like a sailor at any given point. However in the long run that is not how I want to present myself. Everything I do has an affect on someone or something, whether I realize it or not. I don't want to leave that as a trail behind me. What good does that do?

I have always been a people pleaser. If I am going to be apart of a group I want to be one of the favorite members. It's my nature. When it comes down to the people I surround myself with, I want people to walk away thinking that I can hang with the best of them. Keeping my personal image in mind, that limits those that I want to be associated with.

I have received the same comment on more than one occasion. "Those white people don't care about you." To this I now say, "what do you know? You're blinded by hate." Refusing to accept that different race relationships are proof that people can love anyone. What is in that? Classifying an entire people as not being able to care about me. I don't understand why my crowd was so wrong. My brother and sister had white coaches and they never received that comment. What was so wrong with my friends? I didn't stay out with them until all hours of the night. I never had to sneak out to go see them. We weren't hanging around skipping school, drinking or smoking. Most, if not all, of my close friends were abstaining from sex until marriage. They kept me grounded in life not at home without phone privileges. We were the ones who graduated at the top of our class. They were the ones that had me put a filter on my disrespectful language. But they are the ones that don't care about me? Some of my best and favorite teachers that helped me excel were white. They knew be better than most. They encouraged me, nurtured me...but they don't care? Why are the people I am surrounded by the bad ones? They kept my performance in school top-notch. We enjoyed ourselves without fear that what we were doing would get us in trouble. Why are they're friends favored? The people who were smoking, drinking, having sex, pregnancies and abortions. Those that were being benched do to disrespectful behavior. That's the "certain" kind of black person to which I am supposed flock? That's the person that cares about me? The one who will sooner put me in a bad situation as look at me?That doesn't make any sense to me.


I know that there are some serious stereotypes in here. No particular race has an entire body that is one way. I know that. This is just a comparison of what I have in my life versus what I have been pointed toward. I don't like what I have myself become in order to enjoy myself with a predominantly black crowd. I just cannot find the correct black crowd that would count as black. People who have things in common with me are oreos. I don't get it.

Try to understand

I want to put this out there. So that people will finally get this out so there are no questions. I really hope that people are going to take this tibit of information and store it for future reference.

"Everything I do is NOT up for discussion. I do not have to explain myself. I did it. Deal with it. Just because I tell you about it doesn't mean that we have to discuss it. It doesn't mean that we have to go over how prudent it was or was not for me to have gone down that route. I am an adult and, believe it or not, I know what I am doing. I did it. It's done."

So, in the future, if I change the subject or end the phone conversation it's because of the previous tibit. I do not want to talk about it. No lectures, no discussions, nothing. It's done and over. Leave it alone.